The three B’s of attachment parenting
Breastfeeding, bed sharing and baby wearing.
These are all easy with one child. Better then easy, they’re a breeze. They make life so much easier and loads more fun!
Trying to follow these three principals with two children has been a bit more of a challenge.
When I fell pregnant with my second child I was still breastfeeding my two year old- aside from nursing aversion in the first trimester it was not a big deal. I spent a lot of time trying to not freak out about tandem feeding, I knew that I could do it and that my body was made to sustain my children, but I did not relish the prospect. I dreaded the inevitable juggling on one hand, but on the other, I was excited to prove that I COULD.
Thankfully my eldest weaned herself two months before her sister was born. So that took care of that hurdle. I didn't wear her as often as I did when she was smaller, she preferred to be able to run around or be perched on her daddy’s shoulders. The final obstacle that we had to get around, was bed sharing.
We had spent a few months getting her used to sleeping in her own room and she managed it, more often than not, with her dad. When the baby was born we were hopeful that this would continue. My husband would sleep with Lily in her room, and I would have the baby in with me. Then an unforeseen problem arose; Lily refused to be separated from her sister. She would not let her out of her sight.
To sleep away from the baby was certainly not going to happen. She moved herself back into our bed and has stayed put. She fell asleep holding the babies hand every night and looked for her as soon as she woke up (after demanding tea that is, she has her priorities straight!)
Yes it is all very sweet, but I was a nervous wreck. I would move the baby as soon as Lily had fallen asleep in order to protect her fragile body from the vicious kicks to the head, smacks across the face and general sleep violence that any co-sleeping parent understands so well. I started off putting the baby in the cot next to the bed, but that didn't work for me, since I am a co-sleeper through and through. I wanted my baby right next to me.
We improvised by adding a “side car cot” to the bed. Her cot is minus one side and pushed up to the side of the bed. We now co-sleep safely and happily with a baby and a toddler. It has its challenges. Most things that are worthwhile do. I often sleep with the baby’s legs over my head and the toddler’s head on my stomach. Lily wakes the baby up when she talks in her sleep, and the baby wakes up Lily when she wakes for a feed. It is a constant juggle.
To us though, it is a worthwhile juggle. We love it! I understand this sounds awful to many, maybe to most, but to me, it is my happy!
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