Wanted: Parental assistant
Ntombikayise needs someone to make her look good to her kids.
Why is parenting so complicated? Or is it the way that I choose to go about it that makes it so? Failure as a parent means not only scarring your children for life but also increases the number of misfits in society.
It’s so easy to cause damage. After 2 years of looking forward to her Grade R project; Kgomotso’s was handed in so late it was the last one. Why? Because Mommy forgot! Kagiso will tell his therapist how he had to beg for a lift to his cricket match(es) because his mom was running late, yet again!
I have found the solution though; I’m hiring a Parental Assistant (PA). To keep track of the children but most importantly to make sure parental my score card looks good.
The PA’s job will include:
- Keeping track of all the extra murals which ones require parental attendance and which are drop off and go. This includes doing the shopping for the treats etc for all school trips.
- Reminding me of all the punishments I mete out in frustration. So that I know which child is not allowed to watch TV, for how long and for which infringement. This is just in case I forget or my resolve starts to weaken as often happens.
- Keeping note of which outfits are required by who and when. Remind me of Kagiso’s PT, cricket or rugby clothes and on which days Kgomotso cannot wear a dress because of ballet or play ball.
- Keeping track of all the monies I hand out to my children on demand. I’m sure this happens in your house too, children asking you for money just as you running out of the house late for something! If I had a PA I would have a record of how many times we have bought the same rugby jersey even though Kagiso insists it’s a different one.
- Ensure I sign all school notices, diarise and file them when necessary.
- Keeping track of the children’s friends. We all know how fickle our kids can be, this week Simone is the best friend, 2 weeks later it’s Karabo, another week later you get your head chopped for even mentioning either in passing!
I know this sounds drastic but I need help. I have tried organising what’s happening at work, at home and with the kids’ schools and I have failed. Something always goes wrong. How do other working moms do it? Anyone volunteering to be Ntombikayise’s parental assistant? Or do you need one too?
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