We lost our 1st baby
'It was a huge huge nightmare that I really don’t wish upon anyone.'
 My fiancée and I lost our first baby end of February this year.
She was 12 weeks.

We had a bit of trouble during the first 12 weeks where she bled a little but it got better.

Everything seemed to go fine until our fetal assessment at the fetal assessment clinic
There they noticed calcification on one of our little girls’ heart valves, the doctor advised us to end the pregnancy now as she would not make it for the next month.

So we had to see a certain doctor whose name I will not mention as mentioning it makes me furious and enraged.

Everything was set for the next morning as it looked like quite an urgent and pressing matter for the doctors.

It was hell. Holding her hand, walking into the hospital knowing what was going to happen. We couldn’t look at each other without crying.

The doctor told us that the whole process takes about 20minutes in the operating room, but I saw him walking around, dressed in his normal clothes within 10minutes after she went into operation room.

How was that possible?? He then assured me everything went very well.
In the recovery room I waited for F to wake up and to be able to walk out so we can go home.

That night/morning at 02:00 F called me in a voice that I will NEVER forget. When I got to the toilet, she was sitting with our little girl  in her hands.

We went back to the hospital and the doctor said he didn’t err and it happens, but at the same time the nurses told F that they saw everything came out and that the little baby was beautiful.

We still cant understand what went wrong there but needless to say we never went back to that hospital and never will.

We didn’t get ANY aftercare advice, we had to go and research it ourselves. It was a huge huge nightmare that I really don’t wish upon anyone.

But as we sit here today, we are pregnant again, six months now, with a perfectly healthy baby boy.

Maybe it just wasn’t meant for us at that time.


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