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Bathtime - not just for cleaning

Cath Jenkin brings quality time into bathtime.
By Cath Jenkin

Pic: Getty Images

There's not much time left in the day, just for us.
In between jostling the to-do list, the telephone and the stream of urgent-do-it-now-or-apocalypse-will-strike’s, it's understandable that our kids get the raw deal. Time is precious but, moreover - Frankenfurter was right - it is, indeed, fleeting.

When I flung myself head-on into single parenting, that manic race of time sped up.
Somewhere in the 'just cope' phase, I learnt an excellent trick - bath time.

We do everything together in our house - a house that someone quite close to us has termed "awesome because you can do what you like here". So, yes, we cook together, we snooze together and we bath together.

Maybe it's the water. Maybe it's the mom-on-child bonding. Maybe it's the bubbles. Maybe it's the only time I can legitimately ignore the telephone, the doorbell and the threat of the toppling piles of laundry. Unread emails remain unread and I'm not going to worry about whether or not dinner was indeed a fully wholesome meal.

Bath time in our house is an event. There are always bubbles and there is always talking. It's the time where three year old Cam and I talk about our days. She tells me of wondrous finds in the garden at school, and I get to tell her about my day. She loves to hear stories of never-ending meetings. She even shows genuine compassion for my never-far-from-my-right-hand laptop:

"But mom, did your computer go with? Doesn't your computer get lonely if you don't take it to the meeting?"

I think it's important to tell my daughter about my day - for her to know what I'm up to
whilst she's soaking up knowledge at school. I miss so much, every day, of her latest tricks or her newest talent learnt. It's the best way to find out who bit who at school, and whether or not she and her cousin were princesses or fairies today.

Beyond the squeaky toys and the wet floors, there lies my ultimate peace - of time spent
with her, without boundary or demand - of laughter and fun, without an eye on the time.

I know, one day, she'll demand I get out because we both don't fit anymore.
I'm already planning for it - and saving for a bigger bath. 

How do you make time for quality time during your day?

Read more by Cath Jenkin
Article originally in

Parent24

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debz

7/23/2009 4:04 PM

i also enjoy spending that bonding time with my dughter wo is also 3 in the bath (cant always have the water as warm as id like but u learn to live with that) ive been missing them lately she had a op on her belly button at the end of june and until we get the go ahead from the dr that it is 100% for her to get her belly wet she is bathing in very shallow water without the bubbles! but we still bond i go and chat to her while she plays a bit in the water

Cath

5/25/2009 11:34 AM

Ah Candice, soo divine... so so so divine!

Candice

5/22/2009 12:53 PM

I find it so interesting at how many moms use bath time as bonding time. It's wonderful. On week ends my child's father has his turn - and then i have my turn to have that long and well deserved soak. I also think it is important for Dad's to have their turn. By the time the Daddy gets home from work, my son is already fed, bathed and in bed. So he enjoys it just as much as i do!

Cath

5/20/2009 11:25 AM

Ah man, its so good to see other rocking mamas doing it! Good for you Rose!

Rose

5/20/2009 8:42 AM

Tshepang and I bath together at night before we goto bed. This is the only time where we have time to bond, he'll start telling me about school and singing for me. I just love spending time with my son.

Cath

5/20/2009 7:55 AM

Megan! thats so awesome - i agree, im dreading the day she says "close the door and leave me alone!" wah

Megan

5/19/2009 1:20 PM

My four year old daughter, Kiara and I bath together every night. It really is a bonding time, time to catch up on the day and to discover things (songs) learnt at school. I'm dreading the day she asks me to let her bath alone!!!

Cath

5/19/2009 1:09 PM

Marelize! thats such a divine thing! I wish I had had more bonding time with my mom when I was pg - we were both much more focused on my dad at the time - he was terminally ill when I was pg and i dont think we actually really ever got to really talk about my pregnancy. Sad but true. She's with me every day now though and is a doting grandmama.

marElize

5/19/2009 12:07 PM

Me and my mom always bathed together. I am now 30 and she 62 and 7 months ago when I was 8 months pregnant we got in the bath again and had a fun time chatting about all and everything. We were very squized into the tub, but we had fun. Best of memories.

cath

5/19/2009 11:45 AM

Ah Angel - i swear you lived my life before me so that i could learn from you... i get that too - its the most honest communication time. youre a rocking mama. remember that X

Angel

5/18/2009 8:26 PM

My darling Damien and I bathed together for years, and after he said he wanted to bath himself I still spent time with him in the bathroom, singing tthe songs my mom sang to us when we were little and in the bath. And as he was growing up his favourite time to ask me those deep and occasionally embarrassing questions was when I was in the bath... he'd come and plonk himself on the bathmat and ask me whatever he had on his mind. I miss bathtime...

Cath

5/18/2009 12:45 PM

Hey Candice! That's divine man! I seriously believe, that whilst it happened out of pure desperation to just cope and make sure both of us got clean every evening, it has become the best thing i could have done to get some mommy daughter time! It's my fave time of the day! Cath

Candice

5/18/2009 8:43 AM

I couldn't agree more with this. I get to spend 2 hours with my son before bedtime and most of it is getting supper done, getting his things ready, etc. We bath together every night. Not only because it saves time if you are on your own, but it's awesome to sit and be silly with him. He splashes and laughes, tries to dunk my head under the water. This is a true bonding time for us because the time we have is so limited. I know that it will be shortlived. They grow up so fast, so i am taking liberties where i can!

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