My goodness! Jamie, sorry to say, but you have a vile, vile family! How can anyone find it hard to not show love to a child, blood or no blood? Was it because of the child or is it really a symptom that they never fully accepted her mother/your wife as good enough too? My word. Poor kid. And then you go defend your family when they hurt her mother/your wife with their rejection of her child. You cannot force them... booo hooo... pooor you... Why didnt you just try to grow some man!? You are part of the problem, my dear. Poor child having enherited you lot as family.

ps. Just an afterthought. You never accepted this child. That is why your family's bad behaviour was acceptable to you. They behaved in a way that you were actually feeling. That is why you were OK with their sorry behaviour. YOU need a schrink too, not only the child.

7 years of marriage and your family still hasn't make any affords to interact with/love your child? I am sorry but I think you need to talk to them regarding this issue. they need to understand that you love this child as your own and if they don't like her, then they hate one of the most important thing in your life. You don't want a situation were even her siblings will take advantage of the situation, because as they grow up your family might just influence their thinking if you don't play your part before it's too late. U can not leave this to your family to decide whether they like her or not. if she was your biological child what would you do? You were probably going to tell them where to get off. Non the less she clearly might have psychological problems that needs to be dealt with professionally. Please help her built the confidence by reassuring her that u love her. My personal take, I would never allow family member to caused a conflict/ tension/ discriminate any of my children in any way what so ever. They will know right there and then that their behavior is unacceptable and if it persist then they are not worthy of visiting my family.