Posted by: Belinda on 26 February 2013
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How about inviting him over and meeting him? 16 and you worry this much? Really! I thought you were going to say he's 21.
Is it acceptable for a 13 year old to be dating already? I would think they're still too emotionally immature to handle these kinds of relationships or am I being ignorant?
My heart goes out to you, all the best!
"Parenting Expert", Anne Cawood, vaguely tries to answer concerned parent before dropping a sales pitch to go and buy her book of this, and then proceeded to say "..seek counselling from a parenting expert." Useless information is aplenty these days on Parent24, starting with the article last week on teaching your child to pray.
oh grow up....3 years is much older?
maybe you should communicate more with your children and stop listening to what other people tell you,unless you know for a fact that she is hanging out with "older" guys,i suggest you spend more time with her doing things you will both enjoy,and she could have gotten a hickey from anyone (someone her age too)not that makes it better,i fully agree she is to young to be sporting hickeys,communication is the only way you will truely find out what is going on...
and as for the expert..the sales pitch,really?shame on you,you should be helping the mom and not yourself,thats what this page is for.
I recommend that you do NOT buy the book. You need to stop listening to what others say and speak calmly toyour daughter. Think back to when you were 13, did you tell your mother everything? And 16 years is not that big of a gap. If your daughter senses that you don't trust her then she will lie. My father often told me the truth: "Its not that I don't trust you, its that I don't trust other people. I just want you to be safe". Establish rules about smsing you at specific intervals etc as a mode of "checking in". And talk to her...not at her.
Murdering is definitely not an answer. At this difficult stage you should do the utmost to build trust with your daughter, try to be her friend, not her mentor. I perfectly understand what means to be a single mom and how difficult it is to keep your life under control. What you should do (from my own experience as my daughter has already stepped into her early tees and started giving me tons of headaches) is to invite her once to a hearty conversation somewhere out of your normal living place, like coffee shop or picnic in a park, speak to her as if she was your younger girlfriend or sister, not your baby. Ask her about that dude who you suspect gave her a love bite, explain that she is too young to take such serious decisions, not because you are her mother and she must do whatever your say but because you care for her and in no case use authoritative language. Try to show your interest in her life by inviting the guy around for a kind of family lunch. If he dares to touch your girl in such way, it means he has some sort of intentions about her and of course you would love to know better who is the choice of your daughter's heart. It might not work from the very first time but as a mother who knows the situation and her own child much better than me, a stranger who simply attempts to give an advise, i am sure you will find the words, right place and time to start. Wishing you all the best.