Instant Mom | 2012-05-08
ADHD and behaviour
Hi Tyla, my husband has a son (14yrs) from a previous marriage - he came to live with us just on a year ago and was sent to us by his mom because she couldn't control him. he was diagnosed as having ADHD and is on concerta. overall he is a lovely boy but he does play up as any child does - but he uses his ADHD as the excuse to cover for his behaviour. we are able to control it but it is quite testing to have to keep yourmouth shut when it is not your child when you can see he needs a good scoulding. nonetheless - my issue is, every sunday evening he picks up some sort of ailment - his latest one is his stomach is sore, we have given him medication for it and had him at 2 doctors already but without fail come sunday he has the same trouble...i believe he is trying his luck by using an ailment as a way to get out of going to school - how do we get him out of this? we have tried to scare him by telling him he'll have to go to hospital which doesn't work because his mother tells him we are talking nonesense - so it has become a circle of endless pursaution to heim to go to school - how do we end this type of behaviour? who can we take him to that might to get the message across that he is just being faulty and pathetic and making up stuff for nothing - both the doctors have found nothing wrong, we even sent him for blood tests which came back fine.
Hi Instant Mom
Thank you for your message. From what you have described, it definitely sounds like a behaviour problem, and not a medical problem, which is rather commom in adolescents with ADHD. My advice would be to see a Behaviour Therapist, who will design a behaviour program to set in place consequences for certain behaviours, perhaps spend some 1-1 time with him talking about his behaviour etc. One catch is that, for it to be successful, it needs to be applied consistently, which means the WHOLE family (Mom included) needs to be on board. If he keeps getting away with things, he will learn that this is what works, and will continue to do similar things in the future and act in similar ways to get what he wants. Try www.dynamicdevelopment.weebly.com and they can refer you on if need be.
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