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Greg Crighton

Question

Posted by: Jenna | 2012-06-19

Q.

Molesting

My 16 year old daughter recently told me that when she was in Grade 8 and having nightmares she often slept between myself & my husband. On one occasion she says that my husband put his touched her on her lower belly but not on the genitals, I asked him and he does not recall this as he was asleep at the time. Is it possible that he could have done this in his sleep without realising that it was not me he was "holding"? My daughter is traumatised and I have scheduled an appointment with a councillor. I want to protect her but he says he doesn’t remember. I know he often even walks in his sleep and talks and when I ask him in the morning then he has no memory of it? My inner most being is telling me that he really is telling the truth but what about my daughter? I am supporting her and I believe her but should I let this ruin my marriage. She has promised me that it only happened this one time.

Expert's Reply

A.

Greg Crighton Greg Crighton
- 2012-06-20

It is highly irregular for a Grade 8 child or adolescent to be sleeping in their parent’s bed, even when there are nightmare issues that need to be resolved.

The dilemma you have described is now his word against hers, and I am not for one minute suggesting that you believe, or not believe, either of them.

Let her see a counsellor and let that therapeutic process take its course, but my advice for the future is not to let an adolescent sleep in their parent’s bed.

Greg


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