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How much say should parents have over their child's hairstyle? One mom got an earful when she turned to the internet for answers

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"I honestly hate when parents think they own their kid's hair"
"I honestly hate when parents think they own their kid's hair"

As a child grows from helpless baby to 'independent' tween, parenting concerns go from trying to keep them from killing themselves to trying to decipher just how much say you as parent has over your child's style choices. 

One mom was so worried about a hairstyle her 11-year-old daughter was considering, that she turned to Reddit's r/Parenting community for answers to the question, "How much say should parents have over their kid's hairstyle?" 


Also see: Is Kim K wise to straighten 5-year-old North's hair?

Where do you draw the line with your child's choice of hairstyle? Is your child's school's policy on hair quite extreme or fair? Email us and we could publish your comments. Do let us know if you'd like to remain anonymous. 


She wrote: 

"My 11-year-old is the youngest of my 4 kids. She wants an undercut style, which basically means cutting the sides and leaving the top long.
The dilemma is that she has such long and beautiful hair. She has been asking for this style since she was 9 but I'm afraid that she will hate it once it's done. It's going to take so long to grow back out and I don't think this style will fit her face. I'm not a strict parent and know that being too strict can lead to rebellion but I don't want her to make this kind of mistake. I also am worried about the judgment. We go to church and I don't know what people will think.
My husband doesn't like the way it looks. It's not a sexist thing for him. We have 2 boys and he doesn't allow them to have long hair. He is a traditional kind of guy. I'm more open to it but have my concerns.
How much say do you guys have over your kid's hairstyle at this age? Would you draw the line at your daughter shaving her hair?"

For more traditional parents, the instinctive answer would be, all the say! More modern parents who have responded to this user's question offered stories from their childhood to soothe the worried mom, while others felt that as long as a hairstyle is in keeping with school rules, their kids can do whatever they like. 


Also see: Top hair care tips for anti-washing warriors


Here's a look at the opinions shared: 

"If I have to wash, condition, and brush hair – I decide the style"

"Just let her do it. Your husband's reasons are awful"


"Boys at their school need to keep their hair from touching their collar, eyebrows, and ears"


Also see: Hair care tips for kinks, coils and curls


"I honestly hate when parents think they own their kids' hair"


"Parents should only care about hairstyles if the style violates school rules"


"I remember cutting my beautiful long hair short and my dad cried"

"Kids need autonomy"

"She's five. It's her call" 

Chat back:

Where do you draw the line with your child's choice of hairstyle? Is your child's school's policy on hair quite extreme or fair? Email us and we could publish your comments. Do let us know if you'd like to remain anonymous. 

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