Me, only different
Being a parent does weird things to your self-image.
Adele Hamilton, Editor Parent24 (Shawn Benjamin)
"So whose mother are you again?" asks the high school principal.
I haven’t seen too much of him, which is probably a good sign that my son in Grade 10 hasn’t broken any serious school rules. We exchange ideas about the school website, and I leave the office, quite confident that he has already forgotten me in the endless parade of parents that find their way to his door. He may remember I am Miles’s mother, though.
I’m used to my identity being fixed by whose parent I am. In fact in the primary school playground I am often greeted with: "Hello, Joelsmommy."
For nearly 16 years I have been mainly that – someone’s mom. What did I do before I had children? I am pretty sure I didn’t spend my evenings folding washing. I am still my own person, but woven into my own colours are those of my children, indivisible from the pattern of my own life.
As my children get older I begin to feel my own colours getting brighter again. I begin to know myself again: yes, I like walking, no, I’m not much of a one for early mornings.
We’ve gathered a handful of stories that explore our feelings about being parents:The school beast
– Sometimes we don't feel we fit in.Of guilt and asparagus
– How the Guilt Gland can cause self-doubt.'Dad, the Stormers won'
– Sport as a language between father and son.Corruption is rife...
– When we do what we swore we never would.
Are there bits of yourself that seem to have gone missing since you became a parent? Shine a light on them here.