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The biggest hurdle when pregnant is trying to tell people that, whether or not they believe in unmedicated birth, c-sections or epidurals, it's no one's decision but your own.
Not your partner's, but your own.
It seems that soon to be dad, Matte Babel, is struggling to understand the line between himself and his girlfriend, Shay Mitchell, when it comes to this decision.
The couple have been documenting their pregnancy journey in the YouTube original series, Almost Ready, and a recent episode shows the pair going to a birthing class.
According to People, Matte sparked debate after insisting that Shay have a drug-free birth because her body is "genetically engineered" to go through childbirth without any pain medication.
In fact, here's what Matte said:
"Am I partial to no epidural? Yes. Why? Because I'm a hypochondriac. I'm afraid of drugs.
My mom didn't use an epidural...I meet women all the time who didn’t choose to use epidurals."
Shay fired back with:
“Would you get a root canal without any drugs? You’re in excruciating pain and I’m holding the medicine like this and I’m like, ‘You can have it and it wouldn’t do any harm, but you don’t want it. Do you want to be a fighter? Fight through it.’”
Thinking that Shay just doesn't get this whole thing, Matte mansplains his point, saying: “A root canal is not comparable because you’re not born to go through a root canal," Babel explains.
“As a woman, your body is genetically engineered to give birth."
Oh boy!
Although we understand that he might have been coming from a good place, there is a way to go about it.
Some Instagram users were not happy with Matte's statement, so they schooled him on why insisting that his girlfriend have a natural birth was problematic.
Go get your epidural girl
A user by the name of @raniarahmm said, "You really disappointed me in this last episode. It’s Shay’s body, not yours and she ultimately decides what’s best for her and her child. You’re not the one giving birth and yet you’re trying to control how she approaches this. Do us a favour and please just stop talking like you know everything about pregnancy and be a little damn supportive."
Another user, @thereeders said, "So sick of men thinking they can control a women’s body! Wtf! Let her do whatever the f*#k she pleases. You're not pushing a 7lb baby out, let her the f*#k be."
While @nnubnyc hyped Shay saying, "Go Shay! Go get your epidural girl! The baby isn't coming out of him so he has NO say #boybye."
Shay isn't about to change her view because of what her boyfriend says: “Well listen, next time, you can do this,” she said.
Sorry, not sorry.
Chat back:
How much say do you think a father should have with deciding on birth options? Share your thoughts with us, and we could publish your mail. Anonymous contributions are welcome.
