Stay connected to your teenage son
Don’t let your good connection drift away in these crucial years
Ideally you want a relationship between you and your son in which he can say anything he wants to
but cannot do anything he wants to. Try not to take his comments or criticisms too personally; remember he may just be exercising his new intellectual ability.Basics of good communication with boys:
- Spend time with him.
- Turn off the television or put the newspaper down.
- Avoid taking telephone calls when your son is talking to you.
- Unless other people are specifically meant to be included, hold conversations in private.
- Don’t embarrass him in front of others.
- If you are very angry, don’t try to communicate until you regain your cool.
- Don’t interrupt when he is trying to tell his story.
- Avoid correcting him unless absolutely necessary.
- Try to ask questions, not lecture.
- Don’t ask why, but do ask what happened.
- Show that you accept him, regardless of what he has or has not done.
- Praise his efforts to communicate.
- Give him time.
Shaming Try to:
Spend time with him
Do stuff togetherAvoid saying . . .
“You can talk when I’m finished."
“Don’t talk to me like that.”
"I know what’s best for you."
"Just do what I say and that will solve the problem”
“You shouldn’t feel that way.”
“Don’t say that.”
“That is just stupid.”
“Don’t be dumb.”
“That makes no sense at all.”
How do you bond with your son? Share your tips with other parents.