Behind varsity walls
Is your student child really focusing on his or her studies?
The varsity days, such a wonderful time! You are on a high as you have just passed your matric and looking forward to chasing your dreams.
You are away from your parents – probably for the first time. You can wake up anytime you want no one will tell you when to make your bed and clean up your room. You can even decide whether you want to attend lectures or not.
Some people really put this freedom of being away from their parents to good use. I am going to make myself unpopular with students and go through some of the things – the good and the bad - that happen behind varsity residence walls of which parents might not be aware.
Romance of convenience
For some this is the time to start dating. This relationship can develop into something long term and you sometimes hear people saying that they met at varsity and later got married. On the other hand one can be what we used to term ‘carry-me –through-the-course’ – the guy will want to date you so that they can have someone washing their clothes, cooking for them or cleaning up their room.
You are carrying them while they are still studying afterwards they might dump you. Instead of studying the young girl has an added responsibility of looking after this young man. My friend’s room- mate used to wake up early on a Sunday to go cook dinner for her boyfriend and iron his clothes for the week (this guy was also a student) – sadly she never got to see the altar. Damn, after such hard work, I’d see red!
Of course she should have seen to her studies first instead of playing ‘wife’. Some students move in together, only when parents come over to see them do they go and pretend to be staying in their rooms
As soon as they see the back of the wheels, they are back into their boyfriends’ room playing ‘vat en sit’. The money you send as a parents goes towards buying groceries for the ‘household’ as some partners do not contribute in this ‘household’. It’s also common for students to drink like fish and smoke.
I am not sure whether I should comment about pregnancy because this is not news anymore; you do not frown when you see a young woman pregnant in lecture halls.
Not all bad
This is also a time where we have seen young people making something of their lives. Passionately chasing after their dreams and going out there to make a difference in the working world. Having fun is part of student life only if students can know the limit and understand why they are there in the first place and not waste their time and their parent’s hard earned cash.
What puzzles me sometimes is parents who send money but never bother to check their child’s results. Some students drop out in their first year and go back to ‘study for the second year’ while they never even made it through the first year .
Read more by Masanda Peter
How closely should parents monitor first year students?
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