Readers respond to spanking debacle
Should we smack our kids?

Discipline - One Form Of Which Is Spanking! -Eion Watson

I find it really amazing how people, generally speaking, have to discuss and debate so many issues today, in the 21st century, regarding what is right and wrong, when just one hundred years ago these issues were hardly mentioned publicly, one of which is spanking!

The reason I believe this is the case, is that modern man has become secular and humanistic in his thinking and prefers to take the advice given by psychologists and their ilk, in preference to using the ‘manual for living life’, more commonly known as the Bible, which is THE WORD OF GOD!

Just a few examples of what the Bible has to say about child discipline in the Book of Proverbs (for those who aren't familiar with them):

“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline."

“My son does not despise the Lord’s discipline and do not resent His rebuke, because the Lord disciplines those He loves, as a father the son he delights in.” 

“He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.” Prov. 13: 24.

“Even a child is known by his actions by whether his conduct is pure and right.” Prov. 20: 11.

“Folly is bound up in the heart of a child but the rod of discipline  will drive it far from him.” Prov. 22: 15.

“Train a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not turn from it.” Prov. 22: 6.

There are many more passages in Proverbs regarding discipline, but the few which have been quoted will suffice to give an idea of how the Lord views discipline!

I know there will be many people who will pooh! pooh! these comments, but they do so to their own detriment!

Children who don't get spanked are brats -Lauren

Yes I spank my kids, I have two boys and talking helps to a extent. I have seen kids that have not being spanked and they are spoilt little brats who think they can get away with everything and anything.

The bible clearly says spare the rod spoil the child and no I don’t hit with a rod. I have a wooden spoon that my kids get smacked on their bums with. If you ask my kids what they would prefer (a hiding or being grounded) they will tell you they will take their hiding.

I am a firm believer that if a child is really naughty and unruly that they then deserve a good hiding.

Abuse is when you smack your child anywhere you can, and if you hit them for no reason all the time.

This is just my 2 cents.

Stop pampering your kids -Antoinette Jordaan 

I'm not a parent. I'm just an adult that has to live in a world where other people have kids and have to deal with their dramas.

What I experience is a serious lack of respect for other people, a sense of entitlement and absolutely no sense of responsibility. We are pampering these kids to absolute destruction.

In WWII, 19 year olds were going to war, fighting for freedom. Now? Our 19 year olds have their feelings hurt on Facebook. What the hell are they going to do when they start working????

Stop pampering your kids and start teaching them that if you do wrong, there are sometimes DIRECT CONSEQUENCES. And sometimes it's not just a time-out in a corner, sometimes you will get knocked the hell down.

I know that spanking isn't always the answer, but I expect people to teach their kids that bad behaviour will result in punishment.  

Scientific proof -Martyn Longhurst

The scientific results that prove that spanking is detrimental to your child have been known for years.

The very fact that you view spanking as necessary because it was done to you is the same reasoning a partner in an abusive relationship doesn't recognise the abuse.

You have been subjected to it for so long that you have now rationalised it as a part of your life and therefore acceptable. By using spanking on your children, you are perpetuating that abuse. Don't deny the science, stop the abuse.

Balanced Corporal Punishment -Kurt

South Africa, don't be short-sighted

Recently there was a report in the media of a proposal being handed in to have corporal punishment in the home declared a criminal offense!

This is very short-sighted in the light of the reports coming from a country like Britain who are now seriously investigating the possibility of reinstalling controlled corporal punishment in their schools! This speaks volumes. Why must South Africa plunge into the wrong paths of western Europe while they begin to realize that there is something wrong?

We are living in a sick and perverse generation. Public educators are not allowed to discipline disobedient rebellious children using corporal punishment but at the same time governments allow the murder of unborn children through abortion.

So-called "elite" secular thinkers are encouraging the abandonments of discipline which is causing an alarming rise of juvenile delinquency. This massive rebellion against authority and out of control rage of children is often seen on television in the riots in many countries around the world and increasingly in South Africa! This caused Britain to rethink.

The Bible teaches that in the last days "lawlessness will abound".

As God-fearing Christians we believe that the absence of caring loving reproof and correction, including corporal punishment, of children during the formative years enhances disrespect and rebellious behaviour. There is a huge difference between discipline and abuse. Any form of abuse and violent outbursts are harmful for the child. Verbal abuse is just as harmful as corporal abuse. These are not done to bring the child back in line.

While corporal punishment should not be the first and only way of correction, we believe that it should always remain at the very least the last resort. We believe this, because we trust the certain word of our Lord Jesus Christ (Heb 12, 5-6+11): "My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor be weary when reproved by him. For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives. ... For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it."

Just like our Lord deals with us, we want to deal with our children. On the one hand children need clear rules and consistent discipline appropriate to their wrongdoing. Children need to learn: If rebellion or revolution escalates it will have bodily consequences.

On the other hand they need parents who assure them of their genuine love for them. They need forgiveness. They need to hear: You are forgiven. They need a hug which is a form of corporal reconciliation. Corporal punishment and corporal reconciliation, especially in bringing up boys, are very important.

We believe, teach and confess that God's word has indeed never proven wrong and it blesses those who follow it's genuine teaching in the context of the whole of Scripture. It always has the last say.

We call on our government not to be hi-jacked and deceived by some good-sounding reports and "studies" which from the beginning don't allow for a balanced approach on discipline.

Why, oh Africa, do you fall for secular liberal upbringing methods which cannot show any good results? Like Mandela said, we can do better! Lets do it!

We do what our religion dictates -Kahmiela August

My daughter is 5 now and I have given her a spanking which was really meant to sting once. She thought it was hilarious to break away, tear out of our hands, jump off the pavement and run into traffic. She thought our panic was hilarious - a massive joke and paid no attention to our warnings, the naughty corner or time outs. At the Hermanus Whale festival in 2014, 4 years old, she did it again and a car missed her by a hairs breathe. I thank God every day the driver was alert and aware of all these people. And I spanked her bum and she knew I meant it. And she has never ever run into the road again; automatically holds my hand in the parking lot.

We have a three warning rule and a 3 count to change your behaviour. We talk, explain, talk, explain, talk explain then threaten a tap on the bum. That's what our Religion dictates - talk three times so that you're sure you've been heard, before spanking.  Its my job to parent and raise my child with manners, respect for others, morals and knowing right from wrong. Spanking is an ultimate last resort, but I will use it gently if nothing else works. I don't ever have to - as long as she knows I'll follow through after warning 3, by the time she's on warning three her behaviour changes.

It doesn't really matter what the law says. My child is loved, safe, protected, nurtured and the light of our lives. Her outrage and outburst of tears when she is tapped is more shock that she didn't get her way or frustration that her behaviour was not tolerated, than physical pain. A startling realisation that she may be a Princess; her world may be bubbles and rainbows, but the King and Queen call the shots and her behaviour needs to change. And as a consequence, she is courteous, respectful, a joy to elders. She never leaves the playground with strangers. I can live with that.

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