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Partners
I met my husband at a company where we were both employed. After 7 months of dating we were married and I knew from day one that I wanted to start a family with this man. I stopped the pill the month of our wedding in 2009, as I had been on the pill for over 5 years.
Being very young, my only husband being 21 and myself 22, a baby was not on the top of our list.
We worked our way up getting a home, setting up and career on paths. Always forgetting that I was not falling pregnant as when my monthly started I used to experience terrible pains. Towards of our 2nd year of marriage, I started throwing up and a had runny tummy during my period. One month I just fainted with the pain, went to a few doctors but I didn’t get any information I was looking for. I had never heard about endometriosis before.
Finally found a doctor around October 2010 that would do a laparoscope.
In the laparoscope the endometriosis was so bad according to the doctor (stage 5). My ovaries, bladder, bowls, kidneys, upper legs and back had endo. The doctor had mistakenly cut my main artery as he worked on my body for 5 hours trying to stop the bleeding. He had noticed he has also cut my urethra. In efforts to repair he had joined my right urethra to the left one hoping in time the stent would dissolve when healed.
I woke up to pipes in places I never knew could fit and holes I never expected to wake up too.
The bottom half of my lungs had collapsed due to being under for so long. I could only imagine what my husband and parents were going through thinking it was only a 20 or 30 minute operation. To wait 5 hours long with no feedback on what was going on, all they knew I was still on the operating table as per nurses passing by.
For weeks I stayed in hospital in pain in places I could not explain, never eating or sleeping and I kept on swelling. If I laid down I felt like I was drowning. Doctors tried everything they believed could work but I kept on growing and growing.
I was sent home on Christmas eve, only to be rushed back to hospital new years eve for an emergency operation.
Once another doctor went in he had found the stent that should have helped my urethrae move fluid in the right places had came out and was floating inside and poking my other organs, my bladder had been damaged and my kidneys stop working.
All my of organs where physically drowning. I left the hospital around February 2011. I had another operation to repair damaged organs in March 2011, and then I was done.
Infertility
The road of infertility had not even started and we were sitting in a situation where my life had been threaten just trying to start a family. The toll it had taken on my family is unexplainable, my husband looked more sick than I did with being physically and mentally drained.
I went back to work and tried to pick up the pieces of our life, thankfully I have a great job with a supportive management behind me.
By May 2011 I was mentally ready to get back on the baby wagon, my husband on the other hand knew better that my body was not ready. The ups and downs of him wanting me just to be okay and alive and me wanting a baby so much that I couldn’t see reason in his pleas for me to get healthy first.
We tried Clomid for a while and it didn’t do anything. I started getting sick worse than before any of my operations and with not being able to find any doctor that would want to assist due to my bad medical background.
Even just talking to a doctors about trying IVF made them uncomfortable, after some time 2 doctors referred us to go for adoption. My husband was not ready for that as he wanted his own, we decided to take a break because we where mentally and financially drained as the doctors bills kept on coming from my operations.
I started the pill again, worked on our marriage doing what young couples should be doing, and I started working on my health. I have gotten back to what I was health wise and I’m back to normal in all aspects beside the monthly's.
I have been going the herbal route, working on my stress levels. We have been trying for a baby again for the last 3 months, no luck yet but I’m am in a better frame of mind and healthier now to handle anything that comes our way.
We are not following the calendar, or planning when and how it needs to happen, we just going with the flow trying not to think too much about trying for a baby. Keeping very busy with other activities.
Doctors say that naturally it never can happen but we believe in a higher power and one day whether through natural or adoption we will be parents. Our marriage is stronger them most couples our age, we are heading into our 4th year of marriage soon and we going to be just fine.
Venetia
This letter was sent in by a Parent24 reader. Do you have a story to share? You can send it to chatback@parent24.com.
Being very young, my only husband being 21 and myself 22, a baby was not on the top of our list.
We worked our way up getting a home, setting up and career on paths. Always forgetting that I was not falling pregnant as when my monthly started I used to experience terrible pains. Towards of our 2nd year of marriage, I started throwing up and a had runny tummy during my period. One month I just fainted with the pain, went to a few doctors but I didn’t get any information I was looking for. I had never heard about endometriosis before.
Finally found a doctor around October 2010 that would do a laparoscope.
In the laparoscope the endometriosis was so bad according to the doctor (stage 5). My ovaries, bladder, bowls, kidneys, upper legs and back had endo. The doctor had mistakenly cut my main artery as he worked on my body for 5 hours trying to stop the bleeding. He had noticed he has also cut my urethra. In efforts to repair he had joined my right urethra to the left one hoping in time the stent would dissolve when healed.
I woke up to pipes in places I never knew could fit and holes I never expected to wake up too.
The bottom half of my lungs had collapsed due to being under for so long. I could only imagine what my husband and parents were going through thinking it was only a 20 or 30 minute operation. To wait 5 hours long with no feedback on what was going on, all they knew I was still on the operating table as per nurses passing by.
For weeks I stayed in hospital in pain in places I could not explain, never eating or sleeping and I kept on swelling. If I laid down I felt like I was drowning. Doctors tried everything they believed could work but I kept on growing and growing.
I was sent home on Christmas eve, only to be rushed back to hospital new years eve for an emergency operation.
Once another doctor went in he had found the stent that should have helped my urethrae move fluid in the right places had came out and was floating inside and poking my other organs, my bladder had been damaged and my kidneys stop working.
All my of organs where physically drowning. I left the hospital around February 2011. I had another operation to repair damaged organs in March 2011, and then I was done.
Infertility
The road of infertility had not even started and we were sitting in a situation where my life had been threaten just trying to start a family. The toll it had taken on my family is unexplainable, my husband looked more sick than I did with being physically and mentally drained.
I went back to work and tried to pick up the pieces of our life, thankfully I have a great job with a supportive management behind me.
By May 2011 I was mentally ready to get back on the baby wagon, my husband on the other hand knew better that my body was not ready. The ups and downs of him wanting me just to be okay and alive and me wanting a baby so much that I couldn’t see reason in his pleas for me to get healthy first.
We tried Clomid for a while and it didn’t do anything. I started getting sick worse than before any of my operations and with not being able to find any doctor that would want to assist due to my bad medical background.
Even just talking to a doctors about trying IVF made them uncomfortable, after some time 2 doctors referred us to go for adoption. My husband was not ready for that as he wanted his own, we decided to take a break because we where mentally and financially drained as the doctors bills kept on coming from my operations.
I started the pill again, worked on our marriage doing what young couples should be doing, and I started working on my health. I have gotten back to what I was health wise and I’m back to normal in all aspects beside the monthly's.
I have been going the herbal route, working on my stress levels. We have been trying for a baby again for the last 3 months, no luck yet but I’m am in a better frame of mind and healthier now to handle anything that comes our way.
We are not following the calendar, or planning when and how it needs to happen, we just going with the flow trying not to think too much about trying for a baby. Keeping very busy with other activities.
Doctors say that naturally it never can happen but we believe in a higher power and one day whether through natural or adoption we will be parents. Our marriage is stronger them most couples our age, we are heading into our 4th year of marriage soon and we going to be just fine.
Venetia
This letter was sent in by a Parent24 reader. Do you have a story to share? You can send it to chatback@parent24.com.
