Trust yourself to know what's best for you and baby

I spend lots of time counselling moms who are lost in the throes of new babyhood. For some people it’s second nature and becoming a mother is the easiest thing they’ve ever done. For others, it’s a less natural process and it feels tough and emotionally draining: which of course comes with its own large amount of guilt. The longer I work with babies and parents, the more I realise that the best advice isn’t ‘listen to your gut.’

Why? Because instinct is strong but it needs time to be tapped into, recognised and trusted. This baby story is actually all about getting to know two strangers: your baby and your own self as a parent. The ‘parent’ you is not the other you. It’s the maybe more uncertain, perhaps more open, sometimes more nervous, or super confident or downright terrified you.

Point is she is different. And so I feel the best advice is actually more like ‘go with the flow’. Try something and
see if it works for this stranger who has become the centre of your life and for you as parents. Try co-sleeping, try breastfeeding, try baby-led weaning, try a sling or a baby sleeping bag. Try three naps, try two. Try sleeping when baby sleeps, try not. Try what it is you need to try to see what works for your family.

And remember nothing is cast in stone. Even this tiny phase when it feels like the baby is utterly and totally dependant on you for survival (it is!) passes. Everything passes and a new challenge is around the corner.

So give yourselves a break, trust yourself to know what’s best for you and your baby and enjoy the ride!

Click here to download the Sept/Oct 2015 issue of Your Baby magazine!

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