Nothing matters once your baby is here

I didn’t find out the gender of my babies during either pregnancy. But when I first fell pregnant I desperately wanted a boy. I am not even sure why. Maybe it was because I have a much loved older brother or maybe because I thought boys would be “easier” (haha!). Despite wanting a boy I kind of expected to have a girl all along. As if I expected a bit of disappointment, I was prepared for a girl to be born. But I got lucky and I had my boy first. It was what I wanted although I had never verbalised it to anyone else. It was a secret I kept to myself because I thought all moms should just want healthy babies, right? Well, wrong. I think we all have some expectation based on a number of personal reasons. What I can say is this: As soon as Dylan was born I knew without a shadow of a doubt that boy or girl, I was hopelessly in love. I would stand in front of a train for this child from the moment I saw him. That is not to say I was prepared for a newborn or even very good at being his mom but I loved him. And almost four years later when I was blessed with my little girl I was not at all concerned about what her gender was and I was incredibly overwhelmed by my love for her. So my advice if you are experiencing gender disappointment is this: generally it doesn’t matter once your baby is here. You will love and adore them even if their gender wasn’t what you would’ve preferred. If you don’t feel that way when you see your infant and are still disappointed, please don’t be ashamed to speak up and get some help. You are just human after all – a lesson all moms need to remember.

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