Not my child!
Why do some people blame all their children’s faults on mixing with the wrong crowd, wonders Masanda.
I guess the first instinct with most parents is to protect our children, especially in challenging and embarrassing situations. It is not uncommon to hear a parents saying that 'my child cannot do that', 'he mixed with the wrong crowd'.

Of course we claim to know our children better than anyone else, so when it comes to mischievous deeds we don't expect them to be part of them. But is this really responsible parenting when faced with reality versus our expectations of our children?

To me not being able to reprimand your child is a sign of losing the parental role you were given the day you had your child.

My aunt, who is a school teacher, once told me of a mother summoned to school because of her child's bad behaviour. In front of the principal and child the mother was adamant that her child could not have stolen anything from the school.

As soon as the child left the principal's office the mother whispered to the principal: 'I know he did it but if I say that in front of you all hell will break loose at home, he will be cross with me'. When did this mother lose her position as a responsible parent?

Are we so scared of our children?

I have heard of parents who shield their children even as adults. A parent would protect their child even though they know that they are involved in crime. How many times have you heard of a young man stealing from people’s houses and they would hide their stolen goods at home? Can you really tell me that they parents did not see that the child is stealing, selling drugs or driving stolen cars?

As parents, do we sometimes turn a blind eye because we do not want to show our own weaknesses? But it's no use trying to shift the blame onto others for being bad influences over our children. We love them but when they are wrong they need to know we don’t accept or defend the behaviour.

Read more by Masanda Peter

Would you lie to protect your child from the consequences of bad choices?

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